Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
Unemployment sure has its perks!
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
World's most inspiring internship: over.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
As fate would have it, Picks-ar would not have me. Nothing negative, just timing. That's how it works there. I attacked with my usual plan: be yourself, but grant that same self malleability. I think I failed at nearly everything I attempted on the first try. I could see how frustrating it was for people to bring an intern into the picture, how explaining everything to me could be a chore, how I often felt I merely occupied space, praying that I could land a job at the end of it, wondering how I would be judged when I felt I had few opportunities to showcase true talents. But, that's the nature of interning.
And you know what? I loved it all. I loved that the first three weeks made me question myself and my passions. I love that my department ran dry from time to time and I got to work with artists, executives, technical directors, managers, coordinators, editors and assistants. I'm glad I worked for a company I believe in, with a product I can stand firmly by, and I'm glad I made a few friends with whom I'll stay in touch. The largeness of Picks-ar made it difficult to really connect with some folks, realizing that I am 1 of 1000s of interns to have chunnelled his or her way through that building. I wanted to stand out, to be an intern who wasn't seen as transient. I messed so many things up. Most small, and one really important thing. I nearly cried at that one, and it was during the job interview days. I can't decide why I didn't ultimately land a job, and am unwilling to blame it on any single thing, or any big thing. I fumbled a lot of things, but I always recovered myself. Resilience was a large part of this internship.
It took maybe three hours to get over the misery of not landing a job. All the other interns will stay on, so it seems. Fair enough; that's how life operates. And I just read this past blog entry, which I wrote this summer after visiting Picks-ar on duty for my then-internship. Here's an excerpt from that June post:
I got the vibe that this is the best place to work, for any person. OK, no surprise. Maybe I'm a little bitter now that I'm not interning there. Bitter is the wrong word. I'm thrilled with what I'm doing. But I'm justified in being wholly jealous.
I guess I can be proud of myself for getting myself in there, for exiting graciously and for hopefully affecting a few people along the way. There are a handful of friends I'll leave behind as I leave this Friday. Not to mention so many beautiful perks. Here are the four production interns, and my best friends these past 12 weeks (me, Allison, Megan, Jesus):
But I look forward. I never had a job, so I did not lose a thing. This summer feels like it needs to be spent relaxing. Not being lazy. But writing. Remotely. I want to find someplace cheap, someplace beautiful and humble and inspiring, and I want to write. I want to be a successful, self-employed screenwriter. There is nothing secret about my intentions. How the hell will I ever accomplish that without ever physically writing?
Picks-ar has truly inspired me to study the craft. Heck, I was in the Story department, I witnessed the genius firsthand. But every night when I came home, I read literature or screenplays, watched films that needed to be watched, studied up on drama and writing, and outlined my latest thoroughly. But nothing has been written in lieu of a script since last summer. And it's about damn time it happens.
Why do I always feel like the most recent experience is also the most "life defining"? Student Senate was, Telluride was, Studying Abroad was, San Francisco summer was, and now, Picks-ar is. I think I'm good at carrying everything with me, keeping memories and lessons in tow. This one was most definitive in that I worked on my first feature film—not to mention, one that will make 100s of millions and, more importantly, actually contribute to society—but I saw the effect of good storytelling, I worked with and supported the storytellers themselves, and I met 100s of people who showed me what happiness is.